Playing Solomon

Who’s right, who’s wrong?

As a leader of tens of thousands of people I would occasionally be called on to solve problems - disputes. By the time they got to me the issues would be pretty confusing. Plus, this is a marketing organization and salesmen can give academy award winning presentations when they are presenting their case about how they have been wronged. 

I would wind up agreeing with whoever talked to me last, furious with the other party.  Then they would come in and I would become furious with the other. Back and forth, from one to the other. Tons of time would be wasted and I’d just get more and more confused. The wisdom of Solomon would have been a big help.

Then the solution came to me.

I would tell them that I needed their help. I wanted to make sure I got the facts right and wanted to get the problem solved exactly the right way so I asked them to write down a list of the top 5 things that they thought were wrong and the top 5 things they wanted done to fix the situation. I wanted it simple and in their own words.

It turns out most weren’t that upset. Most of the time they wouldn’t even have enough emotion and anger to sit down and write the letter. But occasionally, they did, 

When the letter came, I would just forward it to the other party along with a cover letter saying I needed them to write a response. When they did I’d send their response back to the other, saying, "Here’s what they said. Let me know where they are wrong." Eventually they would get tired of writing letters and resolve the problem themselves. 

Problem solved!

And the best thing was it saved me endless hours of listening, refereeing and debating. Anytime you are in a leadership position you will eventually be called on to resolve conflicts. What's great about this method is that it allowed me to help them resolve it themselves by removing the emotion from the situation. It also prevented me from getting between them and getting caught in the crossfire of a problem that didn’t involve me at all.

Unless you’re Solomon, next time you are put in a situation like this you may want to give this technique a try.