HOW I LEARNED NOT TO QUIT

Fortunately, I was young.

My mother and I were driving home from services at the First Baptist in Enid, Oklahoma. We were in Enid because my dad was stationed at Vance Air Force Base at the time. I was 8 years old. I don’t know why we were alone in the car. Maybe my brother and sister were sick and Dad stayed home with them. I’m not sure…I just know we were alone in the car together when the subject of quitting came up.

This was usual
In my family we didn’t talk about philosophy or principles of winning. You hear people say, 'my Mother always said… my Grandmother always told me….my Dad always said, son…' and then they run off some nifty saying about getting ahead in life. That wasn’t us. My parents were concerned about the basics, eat, sleep, school, homework, church…stay on schedule…be good. No sayings or nifty lessons on life. Except this time.

I have no idea how the subject came up

My mom was emphatic, never quit! She even had an analogy—needless to say this was unusual too. She said quitting was like a taking a wooden square block and rolling it over. She said, once you rolled it over the edge would be dulled a little. That would make it easier to quit the next time. Each time you quit it would get easier and easier…and before long you wouldn’t be able to stick with anything. So don’t quit. Don’t get started.

That stuck with me.
I don’t have many memories of my early years but that one is vivid. A brief moment in time. To my knowledge the subject never came up again. But it was burned into my brain. It became a part of who I am. That little lesson was how I learned about not quitting. I had no idea how important a lesson it was. As I grew older, like everyone, I had some tough challenges…

But there was one thing I never did, I didn’t quit. I never quit, and I never have. Lesson learned.

Idiotic Ideas: "Let's Not Keep Score"

Crazy!

There are school districts in the country that have discontinued the practice of keeping score in games! No scoreboards!

Who are they kidding? Having kids compete in sports and not keeping score?!

The kids aren’t dumb.
It’s funny to hear reports that the kids keep score on their own. They are smarter than the parents! Even young kids are smart enough to know that there is no reason to play a game if you aren’t going to keep score.

Sure, there are always some overzealous parents at these games, but the solution is not to stop scoring. The solution is to exclude parents who can’t behave. 

The point of this is?
What do they think they are “teaching” their kids? Ribbons, trophies and medals for all—just for running around on a field? Life doesn’t work like that. You not only have to get in the game, you have to do well. If you aren’t any good you have to get better. Or find another sport. 

We want more emotional cripples?
Teaching kids to live in denial, to operate in a fantasy world of no judgement does nothing but create emotional cripples unable to deal with the tresses and realities of life. Sure its tough. Sure it hurts to lose. 

But if they can’t learn to handle the emotions of youth sports they’ll never survive in the real world. They need to be comforted, but its equally important that they be encouraged to stand up and fight and improve. Teaching them its good enough to show up and just go through the motions, that effort doesn’t really matter is idiotic and destructive.

Who comes up with this stuff?
Who are these eggheads who come up with these theories? How to they get to positions of authority? Somebody hasn’t been checking credentials, because this is nuts! They’re so out of touch they are oblivious to the fact that kids want a chance to become winners!

When you don’t keep score you deny that to them.

The real world has no use for these theories
Here is reality: In life you have to deliver. You have to perform. You have to meet standards. You have to get emotionally involved. 

If you want real jobs with responsibility and big income you have to be reliable. That ability is not inborn. It’s something that must be developed. 

Kids need chances to develop toughness
As you grow up, you need chances and opportunities to develop emotionally as well as intellectually. That happens by giving kids chances to perform and compete. They need to find out for themselves what levels of effort and intensity they need to exert. They need to develop their own coping skills to deal with disappointment. 

Let them compete! Let them learn how to overcome disappointment and Win! 

Let them keep score!

“I don't know anything that builds the will to win better than competitive sports.” —President Richard M. Nixon 

Winner's Book Club Selection of the Week: The Steve Jobs Way

WINNERS CREDENTIALS

Steve Jobs is the man who brought us the Macintosh computer, the iPod, the iPhone and the iPad and led Apple to become the Number 1 Company in the world. His journey began as a teenager with a lot of passion and ideas and very little money working out of his parent’s garage. It has resulted in a company that has grown bigger than even MobileExxon with market capitalization of over $350 Billion.

Book Description

In The Steve Jobs Way: iLeadership for a New Generation, Jay Elliot gives the reader the opportunity of seeing Steve Jobs as only his closest associates have ever seen him, and to learn what has made him—and the mystique of his management style—capable of creating tools so extraordinary that they have remade three industries and have transformed the way we create, consume, and communicate with each other.

Jay Elliot worked side by side with Steve as Senior Vice President of Apple and brings us his deep insider perspective of Steve's singular iLeadership style—which encompasses four major principles: product, talent, organization, marketing.

Jay shares the lessons that come out of Steve's intuitive approach to show how the creative and technological brilliance of iLeadership can be utilized to drive breakthroughs in any organization, irrespective of size.

About the Author

Jay Elliot served as the Senior Vice President of Apple Computer, responsible for all corporate operations, including HR, Facilities, Real Estate, IT, Education, and Pacific Rim Sales, plus corporate business planning, reporting directly to Steve Jobs, Chairman of the Board. Also, as a member of the Macintosh organization he helped Jobs develop the Macintosh computer from development to introduction. Elliot's articles and interviews have been published in the Wall Street Journal, New York Times, Time Magazine, and Fortune. He lives in California.

Reader Review

OK, I'll admit it. I am a sucker for anyone who can decipher or decode Steve Jobs. After all, the guy is a repeat Icarus. He has flown too close to the sun not once, not twice, but at least three times and every time has come out better than before. The effect he's had on Apple upon his return has been nothing short of a resurrection followed by a seating at the right hand of the Father. 

Jobs is an interesting, mercurial creature, and I often wonder if he is simply one of a kind, a kind of idiot savant who understands how to tap into our wants and needs, and who has an almost messianic vision that we need to follow. Sometimes I suspect that books about him are probably best read to illuminate how different we are from Steve rather than how we can become more like Steve. >>read more>>

Manage Yourself First—Control *YOUR* Outlook

Tom Landry, former head coach of the Dallas CowboysDo NOT say to Yourself:

• They had special advantages.
• They had it easy.
• I had more problems to overcome than they did

That’s what losers do. Losers focus on all their disadvantages. Poor baby...They never have enough to win. 

DO say to Yourself:

• I should have worked harder. 
• I should have started earlier.  
• I didn’t deserve it. They did. 
• They did  a better job. 
• They took it more serious than I did. 
• I’ve got to get better.
• This shows me where I need to improve.

Winners focus on what they DO have going for them. Winners focus on what they CAN do. Winners know they don’t have to be perfect, they just need one way to win.

The Building of “America’s Team”

Tom Landry was the Dallas Cowboys first coach. As an expansion franchise, they weren’t very good. Their record the first year was 0-11-1. All losses and 1 tie.

Someone once asked Tom if he got depressed during the early years with all the losing. Tom replied calmly,

“No. We just went into every game with our best plan to win and then the other team taught us lessons. Next game we made adjustments, learned our lessons, and put together our best gameplan. Then the next team would proceed to teach us some new lessons. We would improve, put together and then get taught some more lessons. As time went on, as we got better, we started teaching the other teams some lessons of our own. We got to the point to where most weeks we were the ones teaching the lessons."

The result? By 1966, The Cowboys had gotten a lot better and went on an historic run of 20 Winning seasons. They had become “America’s team” (according to their PR department, anyway) because as we all know, America loves a winner.

What Tom did to build the Cowboys...you can do to build success in your life!